Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Trash Talking with Vikings Gab

So last year in a shameless attempt to garner more hits, I would occasionally go to opposing team's fan sites and talk a little smack before the game. To my surprise, one of those sites - VikingsGab - contacted me to take things a little further. We had a fun little smackoff and although the Vikes beat us last year, I feel good I won that battle of words.

To my further surprise, they contacted me again for Round 2 and I gladly accepted. Below is the exchange, which definitely got heated...quickly. As my thanks for the invitation, I let him have the last words and man, did he take advantage with some cheap shots. Clearly, I got under his skin - muhahaha. My comments are in green and his are in purple. I'm apparently getting killed on their site in the comments section, so I'd love to know your thoughts.

Before we start this war of Internet words, I’m going to go out on a limb and say we can agree on two things: 1) The Packers and Vikings are the only legit contenders to the NFC North crown and 2) Of those two teams, the Packers clearly have the upper hand. With this year’s NFL MVP at the helm, the reigning defensive MVP on the other side of the ball and weapons across the board, the 2010 Packers have enough firepower and chip on their collective shoulders to make a serious run (while running over the Vikings in the process).

I can agree with your prediction #1, at this point, but #2 is completely ridiculous. If by “upper hand” you mean a pair of over-the-hill corners, an offensive line that will eventually be hated for how often they let your “NFL MVP” get killed, and a #1 rush defense that is sitting in jail… yup, you got the upper hand. I just don’t buy it. The Vikings are oozing with talent. Brett Favre will be back throwing to one of the best pass catching crews in the league, with Adrian Peterson on a war path, and a defense that takes no prisoners. But, the offseason isn’t over yet, and your team can still improve… by picking up some players that the Vikings cut.

I find it interesting that you’re citing age as a factor when you’re pleading for a 50-year old to come and save your team…again. But I admire your willingness to welcome Favre back, knowing full well you’ll get screwed while the window of opportunity gets that much smaller. Isn’t it amazing that “despite” our O-line that Rodgers put up 4400+ yards and 30 TDs? And how much does it just burn you that Ryan Grant had a good of year as your coveted Adrian Peterson? I’d also like to remind you of the hierarchy of castoffs – the Vikings get first dibs on the Packer castoffs followed by the Bears and the Lions. That’s the way it’s always been and always will be.

I agree, it is amazing that Mr. Rodgers had those types of numbers instead of being wheeled out on a cart, the way your O-Line was jumping out of the way of pass rushers. Staying healthy for two years in a row will be a challenge for your “MVP” considering that Bulaga isn’t quite enough attention paid to a woeful O-Line. Grant had 1,253 yards and 11 touchdowns with 11 touchdowns in addition to 197 receiving yards. Peterson? A mere 1,383 yards with 18 touchdowns and 436 receiving yards. Do the math, then consider that Peterson’s numbers were considered a “down year” and you’re still telling me they are just as good as each other? Oh, and Grant’s recent concussion issues should go a long way towards proving that theory. With or without Favre, the Vikes are the superior team. I don’t know that I would brag about your castoffs going to your division opponents only to come back and beat you. On the plus side, though, you don’t have to play the Bucs this year so there’s an extra win and a little less embarrassment, eh?

Like all great teams, our offensive line got significantly better as the season progressed. With Bulaga (stud in the making by the way) now in the mix and Tauscher back at RT, you are going to be surprised. Just wait. I said Grant had as good of year as Peterson in 2009. Sure, AP got all the goal-line carries to stack up the TD totals, but his YPC was exactly the same as Grant’s at 4.4. The big difference was that AP coughed the ball up seven times (losing six!) while Grant only fumbled once all year back in week two. Hell, AP fumbled more in the Saints game alone than Grant did all season. I guess what I’m saying is that #28 fumbles. A lot. You’re telling me that doesn’t enter the conversation when comparing the two? But clearly you’re going to have to pay Peterson like the cover boy he is. And since you’re throwing all your cash at Favre like he’s a cheap stripper, I wonder if you’ll have any left over to pay him (and Rice)?

It is true that the Vikings are a stacked team and NEXT YEAR have some decisions to make as to whom they will pay how much, I must say that it is a good problem to have and that we won’t simply let our best players walk away like the Pack did with Kampman. Plus, we can keep our players out of jail. I think your statement should have read “throwing cash at Brett Favre like a Green Bay defensive back does to hookers.” The fact is that the Packers are not a deep team. If Rodgers, Grant, any offensive lineman, or one of your ancient defensive backs gets injured/suspended/arrested then Packers fans will be screaming the “sky is falling” and rightfully so. The Vikings have incredible depth behind their incredible starting talent and this alone is enough to make them the favorite of the North.

LOL…sorry, but I’m still laughing… OK I’ll stop. For a second there, you managed to make the Vikings sound 2% classy. But then I remembered this the same team known for popularizing the Whizzinator, the Love Boat and diuretic steroids – not to mention proud home to Randy Moss, Jared Allen and now Brett Favre, who played you like a fool, by the way, getting almost $10 million-dollar overnight because of a rumor. Don’t let Sage’s brilliant performance against the Rams 3rd team rosy the view of your backup QB situation…and Tobias Gerhart is no Chester Taylor (speaking of letting good players go). Come what may, the Green Bay Packers do not panic. Just look at how we handled Favre. I completely disagree with your depth statement and you could play the injury card with anybody. The fact is the Packers have players on the verge of breakouts on all sides of the ball – not to mention we are the youngest team in all of football. What does that mean for the rest of the division? Neck pains, mostly. You ever look up for a decade? It hurts.

The Packers fumbled four times, including one from Ryan Grant which was lost, in their first preseason game. Just thought I would point that out. Our hands were tied in letting Taylor go because we were a “final four” team last year, something that didn’t apply to the Packers because Aaron Rodgers decided to play hacky sack with the football in overtime of a playoff game. Gerhart may be a rookie, but he is still a better backup than the Packers have without a doubt. “Verge of breakouts” sounds like preseason hype that will soon be put to the test, and probably fail. In all reality, the Packers are a formidable opponent this year (just like every year) and it will be fun watching the race for the crown. They’re still a bunch of low-life, no-talent, cheese eating losers… but why be uncivil about this? Have a fun season, PackerRanter. We’ll do this again in week six after your O-line has fallen apart, your fans are using injuries as an excuse for your 2-4 record, three more players have been arrested, Aaron Rodgers has followed in his predecessor’s footsteps and forced his way out of that frozen hell hole, your secondary is allowed to start filing for social security, and Ryan Grant has been exposed for the imposter that he is and has fallen back down into the ranks of sub-mediocrity. SKOL!


  1. Bwahahahahahaha! I love this rivalry, and I have tickets to the Viking game again this year. There are no chicken littles more paranoid or defeatist than Vikinng fans, and this is the year we get to sit back, chalk up two divisional wins, and watch the Vikes implode.

  2. Game, Set, Match: Greenfield.

    Vikings fans always come off as mentally imbalanced...with delusions of grandeur.

  3. My favorite comment that I saw so far over there:

    "Well, Adam, you’re in mid-season form! I hope we beat the Packers as bad as you beat the Ranter. (Although I do hate his point about AP’s fumbling – he’s got that one right.)"

    Hmmm, even the Vikings fans know AP has ball handling issues and those who are intelligent football fans know its true and can admit it.

    I love the misguided arguments of Vikings fans who have been preaching for years that "This is our year" and always come up with excuses for why it wasn't in the end. Can I let them in on something?

    You had your chance LY, and you blew it! That golden right arm turned into rust right in front of your eyes.

    SKOL on that!

    Well done sir!

  4. I never thought I would see "SKOL!" written on your website. I've seen it plenty on mine, but when it's written on The Ranter, it's a sad day indeed.

    Having said that, I don't think the Vikings can repeat what they did last year. They're definitely loaded with talent, but Chilly will find a way to screw it up. Sadly enough for Vikings fans, he always does.

  5. "I find it interesting that you’re citing age as a factor when you’re pleading for a 50-year old to come and save your team…again."

    Ah, yes. Save. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=smhiIIekc8g

    But like I said in their blog, queenies fans are easy to please. Who needs rings when you measure sucess by finishing better than the big franchise in the division?

  6. I appreciate the comments/support, guy. I'm glad I'm not the only one who realizes how delusional and obnoxious Vikings fans are.

  7. Did he just call Lambeau Field a frozen hell hole?
    I suppose the metrodome has it's pluses. You have room to stretch out now that the Twins and Gophers beat feet out of there as soon as they could. Plus you don't have to wait in long lines at the trough when 50% of your home games are in threat of a blackout (until Target Corp. buys a few thousand empty seats so the games can be aired).
    However, at least one game a year will be crowded in the metrodome. That's right, all those empty seats will be green and gold for your sellout.

  8. I have to say I'm a bit disappointed. The only real stat that matters is 12-0 and you didn't even bring that up? We build world champions, they build divisional champions, there is a HUGE difference.

    What do you call a Viking with a super bowl ring? - A thief!

    Further how does that guy talk about the Packers o-Line, did he watch that saints game?

    Also NOT EVEN CLOSE as to what team picks up our cast off's. We got Koren Robinson, and Gilbert Brown. Their list is unbeliveably long, Longwell, Favre, Montgomery, and those are just the current guys. They usually have 3 or 4 every single year. Hillarious.

    The only thing you can give them is that they beat us twice last year, then fall silent and say yeah that was last year, we will see how the team responds this year.

    Oh and also remind him there is no way Favre tosses only 7 INT's this year, unless he only plays 2 games and even then it might be close!

  9. http://www.packers.com/media-center/videos/Rodgers-Nothing-But-Net/d0c985c4-b836-417f-aeb0-ed20340ccb47 = M.V.P.

  10. I was thinking even more and realized that I really dont think any Packers fan can be satisfied by a rant on how terrible the Queens are. I mean you could have written pages and pages and pages and pages, well you get the point. And I would have been pissed that you missed this or that.

    Its like trying to figure how many are too many hot chicks to have at a party, there are never enough. Or how many brats are too many, see previous example, or beers or Rodgers TD passes.

    Do you all get my point? I'm sorry Greenfield, you did a noble job and you can only write so much in a day, next time bring up the 12-0 thing, or the Theif joke, all timeless classics that really get under the Queen's fan skin.

  11. Thanks man. Yeah, it was a pretty quick-paced exchange so I knew there would be some things I missed. Plus, we were supposed to talk about who's team is better this year. The good news is that he said he wants to do it later this season, so I'll definitely incorporate some of your thoughts!

  12. Alright, well be sure to mention to him that favre has 23 INT's come week 8 or 9 when you do this next!

  13. I would also like to see you work in the phrase,"How duz your munky checkbook?"
    As its meaning is not narrowly defined, its meaning may be infinate. The answer could be four, or green, or Nevada.
    In fact, if the next interview goes downhill, you can always end with "Go how duz your munky checkbook yourself."
    Rude, but to the point.


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