Friday, March 16, 2012

Hello, I'm Frank. Remember me?

I believe it is said that you learn things about yourself in times of hardship.  That may be true, but then the flip-side should is also true: you learn things about yourself in times of prosperity. I would hazard a guess that most people would consider a Super Bowl victory and subsequent 15-1 season to be a time of relative prosperity...probably not even relative prosperity, just flat-out swim around in your money-bin, dance-of-joy, golden ticket prosperity. 
You know what I learned in this new age of Packers’ prosperity?  
Prosperity makes me soft.
As you’re aware...or maybe not...probably not, actually. The number of posts around this joint started decreasing, my vitriol towards moronic Bears and Vikings fans faded, and I started viewing things through a very fashionable set of rose-colored glasses over the last year. My discussions about the Packers were void of passion, my email debates were forced and lacked conviction. After all, what did I really have to debate? The Packers were clearly the best team in the league, I felt no need to point out flaws or analyze potential chinks in the level 35 Armor of Invincibility (+20 Ranged Offense, -15 Ranged Resistance). The Chiefs loss bothered me, but it was more the “Huh. I’m Kind of Bummed Out This Week, But It Will Be Resolved Come Sunday” kind of feeling. Lo and behold, it was resolved. I’m a damn prophet. What is there to get worked up about when even with Matt Flynn at the helm, the Packers turned in a win when Flynn decided to write his own paycheck for the this year.
Then something happened that should have woken me up....Oh, the Packers got smacked around by the Giants? Oh. Well, that’s too bad, but they had a great season, and they won it last year.  Can’t be too upset. There’s always next year.  They’re a great, young team, they’ll be fine next year.

Never in my life would I have predicted thoughts like this would enter my mind let alone be verbalized to I said, SOFT. Soft like this, and this, and this.
I am Franklin’s walking shame bucket.
You know what happens when you go soft? You wake up one day and realize that your fellow Ranter with the fabulous hair has vacated the premises (although he left me three red bulls in the mini fridge, so that was nice...or maybe just forgetful), one of your favorite Packers of all time has traded in his cleats (temporarily) for tap shoes, and a neighbor has hit the bigtime
Wow. A lot has changed.

Moving forward, I vow that this softness and apathy will not happen again...okay, I strongly believe that this won’t happen again...okay, I can promise you that my vitriol towards Vikings and Bears fan will never lessen again, but the whole lack of posts thing may be recurring, especially since Robert found an exit and made it back to Zion without me. Also, the rose-colored glasses will probably persist, if for no other reason than I find it tiresome to always be angry at the teams I cheer for. How do people do that? They've got to be miserable.
Anyway, I’ve already got two new posts queued up, so maybe you can be entertained for 3-4 minutes...then again, maybe not.

I think Fast Eddie Felson said it best:


  1. Good to hear Franklin, but as a wise man once said, "Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me again . . . I can't get fooled again."
    Rant topic; the one and only Lambeau Mooner is back in San Francheesy. Word has it he runs the 40 in 4.4 . . . still. Will his mouth ruin an otherwise impressively cohesive team? Are golden gate traffic cops wearing full riot gear in anticipation? Will he pay for his new apartment with straight cash, or will he take advantage of historically low mortgage rates, homie? Engage rant.

  2. Is it too late to add a loop of "Eye of the Tiger" playing in the background of this post?

    The Ranter's back with a vengeance.

  3. A_Lerxst_in_PackerlandMarch 23, 2012 at 5:54 PM

    Buck, that wasn't a wise man, that was the village idiot...

    Franklin, wow, a Matrix reference, Level 35 Armor of Invincibility, and Charmin to boot! You really ARE back!

  4. This is just like when daddy divorced mommy and I would sit on the front steps every Saturday morning with my ball and glove waiting for that sound of his 1979 Trans Am as it rounded the corner. "This weekend we're on for sure Jonny, I'll see you real soon I promise." So I'd oil my glove all week and hide my favorite pair of jeans so mom wouldn't wash them and dad would think I was being my own man. Only to be devastated week after week when that God damn bight orange piece of shit he loved so much never did round that corner. Promises Franklin...promises.

  5. To the lonely Ranter who shouts on the hill:
    I guess you got what you wanted; praise, rant ideas and I think Mr. Vicious pulled a reverse Skywalker on you and revealed that you are his father. (didn't see that coming)
    You had us swooning like Grandma when she gets that once-every-five-years call that starts off, "I'm sorry I haven't called more often." "Oh, never mind that Dearie. There is bridge on Tuesdays, bingo on Thursdays and all the applesauce you can eat here at the home. I'm just glad you called now."
    But, now it's clear, "Twitter killed the Blogger Star." (patent pending)

    Check you later,


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