Wednesday, November 29, 2017

I Will Find the Truth

It took me a few days to make sure this post couldn't be traced, so I apologize for the delay. I am being watched, most likely by some combination of NFL Security, the Ecuadorian Deep State and The Olive Garden Corporation. But my message will not be stopped. I have reason to believe the fix was in on Sunday night. For dots I have been unable to connect as of yet, I believe that a loose coalition of Cathy Lanier, Quito spooks and the purveyor of bottomless breadsticks wanted the Pittsburgh Steelers to win Sunday night, or more likely, they wanted the Packers to lose.

I don't have the specifics as to time remaining, down and distance, etc., as the end of the game was hazy for me. Do I believe that someone slipped something into my Laphroaig to discredit me? I cannot confirm that, but my neighbor did find me tangled in her Christmas lights muttering, "Braveleg can make that kick." I'll let you be the judge about the contents of my Super Bowl XXXI lowball and whether I was drugged. I digress.

Game tied. Packers ball. Brett Hundley ready to replicate the Packers' previous possession and go the length of the field to take the lead and the W. What happens? Brett Hundley gets his bell rung on a blatant, cheap, dirty helmet-to-helmet hit. Fifteen yard penalty? Wrong. No call. Packers have to give up the ball. A couple plays later, the Steelers have a flag thrown on them on what was an obvious holding call. I had the perfect angle from my Reggie White bean bag to see it. Obviously a ref did too. Ten yard penalty? Wrong. The flag is mysteriously picked up, after what is most certainly someone in the earpiece of the head official telling him that that is the wrong call to make. A play or two later is the so-called catch by Antonio Brown. You know who didn't know it was a catch? The two refs whose job it is to know if it is a catch. Both stood and stared at each other, neither willing to make the call until one tentatively lifts up his arms, signaling catch. After a long review, using ultra slow motion and still photos, they do, in fact, call it a catch. BUT, if the refs had called incomplete initially, would the review have been sufficient to overturn it? NO ONE WILL EVER KNOW.

And now, the final indicator that the Packers were playing against more than just the Pittsburgh Steelers, that they were playing against a nefarious group of shadowy and powerful individuals. Somehow, after the review of Antonio Brown's catch, the refs determined that time needed to be added to clock. You know what really helps when you are getting lined up for a last second field goal? A FEW MORE SECONDS.

...oh, man, I just noticed that an Olive Garden catering truck has been parked across the street for the last three hours, but nothing has been loaded or unloaded. I most likely will need to disappear for awhile. Remember, constant vigilance! We cannot, and will not, be silenced. The answers must be found as to why this game was stolen from the Packers. I will not stop until I find the truth, friends.

Franklin out.

Monday, November 27, 2017

Zombies Versus Packers: The Movie

The movie opens with the Packers about to play their last game of the season. A win here at Lambeau would only be a consolation prize but may provide a glimmer of hope in an otherwise turbulent season filled with injuries, chaos and infighting. They appear ready to play but just get destroyed. Fans boo and exit the stadium in the middle of the 3rd quarter and by the time the game ends, Lambeau is already almost empty.

As the final whistle blows, tempers come to a boil and there’s a fight on the field – amongst the Packers players themselves. Heads are definitely gonna roll for this one. It’s a low point in the history of the organization and the NFL.

In the locker room, the players dress and collect their things for the last time. Their season is over. It’s depressing as hell and they just want to get home to their families now, but unfortunately not just yet. The head of security comes in and tells players to stay in the locker room for the moment. There are apparently a few angry or drunken fans roaming around and possibly violent.

As the players wait it out scrolling through criticism and memes on Twitter and Instagram, a SCREAM followed by GUN SHOTS is heard from somewhere outside in the corridor. With the players confused and on edge, a STAFFER barges into the locker room. He’s covered in blood and seriously hurt. The kind-hearted Mason Crosby approaches him and asks if the staffer is OK, but there’s no response. He falls silent before ERUPTING in rage and attacking Crosby. The staffer is no longer human – he has turned into a freaking zombie.

Justin McCray and David Bakhtiari rip the attacker off Mason and throw him against the wall. The grotesque creature surveys them and gets ready to strike. The linemen warn him but he attacks anyway, biting at anything it can sink its teeth into. This is now life or death.

Randall Cobb grabs a pair of ¾-inch-spiked wet weather cleats and wails on the zombie’s head, ending him for good. It’s a terrifying ordeal and it’s about to get a lot worse. The main power goes out and the backup generators kick in. Through social media, the players learn the inside of Lambeau is swarming with these bloodthirsty, infectious creatures. The stadium is on complete lockdown with no one going in or out. The still-unknown outbreak must be contained at all costs. This is really happening.

SWAT and local police surround Lambeau with the National Guard on its way. The media is going bananas and the world begins to pray for the Green Bay Packers.

But this team is not going down without a fight. They don their helmets and pads more like suits of armor than uniforms. Crates filled with various weapons the Packers can use are airdropped right there on the 50 yard line.

The field lights snap on, and so do the cameras. The Lambeau Zombie Apocalypse is going to be a commercial-free, televised event. 

The zombies stand at the opposing end zone while the Packers wait on their own. Tune in as the Packers do battle for real survival in:


Thoughts? Additional ideas? I was thinking the outbreak was caused by poisoned stadium nacho cheese created by evil scientists within the Minnesota Vikings’ organization to literally kill off our fan base.

Wednesday, November 8, 2017

Packers Film Study Session – Billy Elliot

One of the most pondered questions in life is what makes someone do what they do? Why is it that certain people continue to flourish while others just can’t seem to catch a break? Is it luck? Is it hard work and perseverance?

Whether true or just perceived, the Packers organization and front office comes off at times as a bit… corporate. Of course, a legacy of championships, history and millions upon millions of revenue dollars serves as proof of their substantial organizational and brand power. But despite all the self-confidence in the world, no one should ever be too sure of himself – just ask Ivan Drago how that worked out for him.

You can talk all day about being a professional, being prepared and flawless execution but what about awakening the inner beast once in a while? The same one that eats lighting, craps thunder and offers random barbaric yawps to the moon? Did you know the average age of this team is like 26, which is still on the cusp of adolescence and adulthood? And the perfect time to fuse brain with beast.

The key to understanding the Packers predicament and motivation lies in the seminal film, Billy Elliot (2000). This remarkable underdog story of an 11-year old aspiring ballet dancer stuck in the coal mining town of Evrington, Durham County, Northeast England, perfectly parallels with the Packers current situation. I’m even willing to bet very few within the organization have seen or heard of it, nor would they consider an independent British dance drama film the perfect spark to ignite the fire within their collective bellies.

Allow me to explain.

In the movie, Billy lives with his hardened father and brother, two coal miners out on strike. To toughen up his son, Billy’s father sends him to boxing classes, which also happens to share the gym with a girls’ ballet class. Unbeknownst to his father, Billy joins the ballet class and his teacher begins to believe Billy has the potential to study and the Royal Ballet School in London. But his father finds out, and his disapproval and sheer stubbornness extinguish whatever hopes Billy might have of becoming a professional dancer.

The Green Bay Packers are in a similar situation. Under the care and guidance of McCarthy, Brett Hundley remains trapped in an environment that on the surface would appear to look out for his – and his team’s – best interests but one that also suppresses potential. What if they unleash the reigns and he’s no good? What if he fails? These questions and others like them are aptly addressed in the film.
Photo taken by Jim Matthews, Green Bay Press Gazette
Getting Billy into the Royal Ballet, you see, is only a metaphor for the taking that so-called leap of faith into the great unknown. McCarthy could turn back at any time, but it must be his conscious decision to lead Hundley – and the team – onto a new and hopeful path outside their comfort zones. This is no guarantee of success, but this action must be taken if any success were to happen at all.

This dilemma is precisely what Billy’s father eventually must come to terms with and so must McCarthy. If not, we know that Billy will languish in despair and grow up in the British coal mines like his brother and father before him. Similarly, we accept the fact that Hundley will also be stuck in check-down purgatory, never being able to blossom as a starting NFL quarterback, and giving the Packers no hope to overcome the cruel, unforgiving and inevitable losses that await.

A major turning point of the film shows Billy standing up to his father in the form of an impromptu dance, causing his father to drop his guard and see the potential that lies within his son. From then on, Billy’s father realizes he must do whatever it takes to get his son into the Royal Ballet School and acts accordingly.

In the final scene of the movie, Billy has long been accepted into the Royal Ballet School. We see his father (aka McCarthy) come to see what has finally become of his son (Hundley) during a performance of Swan Lake. A focused, stronger and more mature Billy gracefully leaps across the stage during the climax, thrilling the audience and astonishing his father. The “score” is irrelevant because the previous decisions that were made allowed us to be symbolically victorious. Whether that means winning games or just being competitive is to be determined…

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